Just the Rules: Think Like a Cheater?

Has anyone considered hiring bad guys to catch the chess cheaters? I’m talking about other cheaters. Why? Because the bad guys know how other bad guys think. Because the bad guys have a mindset—and probably a skillset—that many trusting good guys do not have. In the chess universe: to catch a cheater, perhaps you must think like a cheater.

And if you can’t do that, hire one.

Up until now, the chess universe has been reactive - not proactive - about cheating. Let’s take a peek.

The Lone Wolf:

In the ancient times, Mr. X took a lot of restroom breaks —"bad kidneys” was his explanation. Mr. X was also a wizard at chess openings. He played the start of his games with the precision of a Grandmaster. One day, Mr. X finally got caught in the restroom with his copy of MCO (Modern Chess Openings) while his game was in progress. The powers that be reacted by creating a rule prohibiting the use of written material while a contest was ongoing.

Of course, today Mr. X has a cell phone, complete with a chess-playing program loaded onto it. At OTB tournaments, he still takes those restroom breaks. The reaction: organizers began posting restroom sentries to collect cell phones from everyone before they entered the lavatories. This at least keeps honest players honest. FIDE even outright banned all electronic devices from even entering the playing site.

Mr. X has been forced to find other private spots to conduct his nefarious business.

The Magician’s Assistant:

The art of mental magic often depends on the secret communication between the magician and their assistant—it is no different in chess. Our good friend Mr. X hired chess masters to help him crush his opponents. The master circulated the tournament room like an interested spectator, paying especially close attention to his employer’s game. When it was his boss’s turn, he would use an agreed-upon signal system to indicate a four-star move. The wink of an eye or a head scratch might easily refer to a piece. Standing by the water and then walking over to the other side of the room could represent a starting square and an ending square. Of course, there are rules against this behavior, but catching it is problematic and preventing it is also challenging. Luckily at OTB events there are many eyes to detect when something fishy is afoot.

In the pre-pandemic OTB world, Mr. X did not even need help from a master-strength cohort. All he needed was any regular partner with access to a cell phone and the aforementioned chess-playing program. Add the right equipment—like invisible ear inserts—and the job of feeding four-star moves to Mr. X becomes even easier.

The biggest roadblock is the transmission of moves between accomplices, especially if they are positioned outside of the playing area—but again, a simple signaling system and several partners-in-crime could solve that problem. Of course, today if the games are broadcast online, Mr. X only needs those invisible ear plugs plus one prodigy friend out of camera range—even if they are in another room.

This suggestion was given to me independently by no less than three sources. One of them is a well-known local sandbagger—it takes a cheater to catch a cheater!

Blatant self-promotion: In my book with Wayne Clark, My Opponent is Eating a Doughnut, the tale “Old School” paints an interesting picture of cheating using a coffee cup.

The free, updated US Chess Rules (Chapters 1+2 + 10 +11 from the 7th edition rulebook) are now downloadable and available online. Previous “Just the Rules” columns can be viewed here. Plus listen to Tim when he was a guest on the US Chess podcast “One Move at a Time.”

Tim Just is a National Tournament Director, FIDE National Arbiter, and editor of the 5th, 6th, and 7th editions of the US Chess Rulebook. He is also the author of My Opponent is Eating a Doughnut & Just Law, which are both available from US Chess Sales and Amazon/Kindle. Additionally, Tim recently revised The Guide To Scholastic Chess, a guide created to help teachers and scholastic organizers who wish to begin, improve, or strengthen their school chess program. Tim is also a member of the US Chess Rules Committee. His new column, exclusive to US Chess, “Just the Rules” will help clarify potentially confusing regulations.